WARNING: IN CASE OF RAPTURE THIS CAR WILL BE UNMANNED
And my first thought was "What an arrogant prick." Well, actually, my first thought was probably "Wish I didn't have to go to work today, I'd rather be doing something else and getting paid for that instead, like being a virgin converter or something cool like that." But it was probably soon after my first thought upon seeing that particular license plate frame.
Anyway. Let's face it, this message is really saying that the person who bought and displayed it thinks they are so unbelievably perfect that, were God to pick and choose who they wanted to take to their kingdom if the Rapture were to actually occur, then Religious Tool Who Displays Their Belief On Bits Of Plastic Attached To Car (RTWDTBOBOPATC, for short) would be one of those God chose. You can't get much more arrogant than assuming that God thinks you're great, can you? You're basically saying "Oh yeah, the supreme being and creator and master of all existence would totally pick me over all the other billions of candidates."
Or are they just claiming to be a perfect Christian? Really? Always turned the other cheek? Always loved thy neighbour as thyself? Never judged others? Ever? Rendered unto Caesar? They've absolutely lived a life completely and utterly according to the Bible? Really? Abandoned uncircumcised boys? Stoned disobedient children?
What this license plate frame says to me is either: "Yes the owner of this vehicle is so monumentally egotistical and arrogant they think God favours them massively" or "Yes the owner of this vehicle really has no place amongst a modern society since they are possibly a child killing, misogynistic bigot with genocidal tendencies and a complete inability to function in the 21st Century."
Neither of which are things anyone should be bragging about, surely?
And another thing...
But, even disregarding that, I also had another thought at some point after the thought that probably wasn't the first thought after seeing this particular license plate holder. And boy do I wish I wasn't typing this next to an open window through which the smell of flame grilled burgers is now wafting. But I digress.
My other thought was this: If you think that at any point you might suddenly disappear off the face of the Earth isn't it highly, massively, irresponsible of you to be driving any type of vehicle or to be a part of any crew operating a vehicle or other form of transport - especially aircraft? Should you in fact not be operating any form of dangerous machinery? Should you in fact not have any kind of job which requires constant vigilance for safety reasons - did you even admit to your employer that you might disappear at any point whilst on the job?
"Well, I think that concludes the interview for the position of Person Who Stops The Reactor From Going Into Meltdown. Do you have any questions or comments for us Mr Fanatically Religious Tit?"
"Erm, well, yes actually. I lead such a virtuous life that it is highly likely I may be Raptured up to the Kingdom of God at any point. I hope the very real chance of me suddenly disappearing whilst on the job doesn't knock me out of the running. I'll be with the Almighty, but obviously not able to perform my duties as contracted. Do you have a Rapture clause in your contracts? What are your procedures in case of Rapture?"
Or (and this scene works best if you imagine Michael Palin sitting in a white coat and dark pin-stripe suit opposite Graham Chapman and John Cleese in similar attire but behind a big wooden desk in a wood paneled boardroom).
"Well, I think we are ready to make our decision about who will be appointed Chief of Cardiology, do you have anything else you would like to add Dr. Condescending Big Head?"
"Er. Well, there is the delicate matter of my impending Rapture."
"I'm sorry. Your what?"
"So, am I to understand that you think that at some point you may be Raptured up into the kingdom of Heaven? At any time?"
"Even during surgery?"
"A triple bypass?"
"Yes. I won't even know when."
"Well yes. Thank you doctor. Next."
In fact, shouldn't the rest of us (unbelievers, theists of a different stripe and the not quite so unbelievably fucking arrogant) be petitioning governments and employers the world over to prevent people like those who believe they will be Raptured from basically doing anything but staying at home, on the sofa, in their Sunday best, and not touching anything? Wouldn't it be hugely irresponsible for an airline or hospital to hire a pilot or surgeon who thought they could at any point just be Raptured away?
Shouldn't we all stay at home to avoid the dangers of a society where people can at any time disappear no matter what they were doing?
Or, is the fact that we don't do this and don't encourage governments or employers to take this into account basically just an admission that we all understand that the whole Rapture idea is REALLY BLOODY SILLY?